My Comeback

It took me (or my surgeon really) 11 months to be cleared to fight again. This was around December so around this time Coach Jason and I were already planning when the next fight would be. For the last few months I had been feeling really good about my training and I grew confident with my knee. I was just itching to fight again. We discussed before that we would make my return to the ring in January 2015. Initially, we anticipated fighting for TCB January 31st. I couldn't get an opponent matched up for me and the whole show just fell through. Luckily a few days after the New Year, Rami Ibrahim from Rami Elite was matchmaking for Gut Check Championships scheduled for January 24th. 

Although I had been cleared to fight in December 2014, I had been sparring Muay Thai since the 8th month mark. My knee held up fine during those long cross training sessions so I felt confident that 6 minutes in the fight wouldn't be a problem. I did worry about my conditioning considering I was on such a long break off my legs for a considerable time during the recovery. Training went well but 2 weeks before the fight I got really bad shin splints on my right shin…the “bad” leg. I had to stop doing sprints on the turf and instead did sprints on the bike. That worried me because I felt like my conditioning would be affected. 

The weeks leading up to the fight, I just felt so blessed to get the opportunity to fight again. Not only did training go relatively smooth, but I felt mentally ready. I felt like I was hitting harder, hitting faster, and I felt like my mind was right for the first time ever. In the past I have been an emotional mess and I would be full of doubts about my performance and thinking I was going to lose the fight. This time was different. The whole year I had been watching everyone else train and seeing my teammates enjoy the whole fight experience. I had been wanting it so bad, all I did last year was imagine my own fights and even my training sessions. So, before this fight I just imagined it going my way. I imagined perfectly placed punches, kicks, knees, and push kicks. And only pictured my hand being raised after the fight was over. 

The weight cut could have been smoother. I had the flu all day Wednesday so I took the whole day off to rest and hydrate. I was still sick Thursday but I had to train and cut. By Friday, I miraculously was better even while not being able to eat or drink for 24hrs. After lab, we drove out to Delaware. We checked in and cut the last couple pounds and I weighed in at 122.6 lbs. After hydrating and eating, I felt amazing! 

The day of the fight, I woke up early and did 3-5 rounds on the pads with Coach Jason and did the elliptical to wake up my body. We ate breakfast and had a light lunch before heading to the venue. While we waited for the locker room to open up, Kristan braided my hair and Jason wrapped up my hands. It wasn't until I changed into my Muay Thai shorts and started warming up where I became emotional. I would go from focused and calm to really excited and then on the verge of crying because of all the loops I had to jump through just to get to this day. All the emotions were just overwhelming. I was feeling this way the entire time I was in the warm up area. By the time I walked out and into the ring, I was super calm, almost too calm for the fight. I heard them announce my name and heard everyone yelling in the crowd. It just felt good to be in there. When I was in the ring, I stood there the few seconds before the fight started thinking with my eyes closed tight, “I can do this.” After everything, the fight I was imagining was right there and it was gonna really go down. 

My opponent, Mary Brulator, had as much experience as I did (if not more) and also came to fight hard. I anticipated her coming forward for a fight and also to try to clinch me up. 

First round we touched gloves and she landed a big rear push kick. I was okay. I had to find my range and so I started off with a jab kick 1-2 and in the clinch we went. In the clinch she was a lot stronger than she looked. We broke and I remember just shaking off the jitters. I needed to get back into gear this round and fast! I only had 2 minutes to win it. She landed good straight punches. Looking at the footage, I was surprised at how much the combos I threw flowed. My training was really translating into the fight.

Round 2 started off very faced paced and we exchanged strikes on the outside for like 30 seconds. We clinched up for 30 seconds, broke and started exchanging more strikes on the outside. I did hesitate in this round. I still needed to find my range. This round was close and I think it could have gone either way. I wasn't as active in the clinch and she looked good in this round.

Round 3 I went for it. I felt strong and ready to go! I finally was able to get full control in the clinch and pull her into my knees. She slowed down a little bit in this round and I came back stronger. She landed really good straights. My head movement sucked and I would just eat them.

When the fight was over I just held my hands up. It was over. Coach Jason and Jared removed my gear. I just felt relieved that I did it. When they announced the winner, I felt confident that I had won. But since, I left it to the judges I kept my head down as I listened to the results. They announced I won and raised my hand up. I just felt calm and relieved that I did it. I was back.

I feel content with my performance. I wish I was more active on the outside and I feel like I could have done better in the clinch. But, I came out of the fight without any injuries and my legs were perfectly fine. This fight wasn't just to shake off the ring rust. It was super important to me. I hadn't fought in 16 months and prior to that I only had one fight in 2013 before blowing out my ACL. I feel like I collected enough data in those 6 minutes to know where I was at in my training. To my surprise I have gotten better since my last fight in 2013 even with my long recovery. Perhaps most importantly, I finally believe in myself. I will be back in the ring in less than 5 weeks and I am confident I will just be even better, stronger, faster, relentless and more fearless. Im back!

Fight scheduled on January 24th

I now have a fight scheduled! Its fitting. Its the 1 year anniversary of my ACL reconstruction and meniscus repair. I can't believe it. I have spent a lot of time and energy wanting to be able to fight and its here.

I weigh in at 122 lbs in 19 days. I have been very disciplined with my weight cut. Initially, I thought I was to fight at 118 for another promotion. They couldn't find an opponent for me. Today, a match maker from a different promoter needed a 122 lb female. The fight is modified muay thai rules. I wear shin guards. If I don't wear head gear, I am supposed to wear 12 ounce gloves.

I don't feel as stressed out about the fight like I normally would. In the past, I have been an emotional mess. Full of doubt and without confidence in myself. I feel like the injury and long recovery gave me something I didn't have before. I don't know if its more confidence, but I certainly feel a lot more tenacious.

47 weeks and 2 days

A year ago today I blew my ACL. Its been a crazy ass year. Thats all I have to say. I am so glad I can think about lab work, train, and start planning my next fight without worrying about my knee. On a scale from 1-10, whats the pain level? I give it a 0! I was looking at older posts about the pain level and for the entire year I have given the pain level a 1. I always wrote and told my doctor that the level of pain was the lowest. It was probably really a 4 and a 5 on the days when I had PT. I guess I just didn't want to admit the level of pain I was really in and I wanted to convince myself that I could still do everything and more.

Im 6 weeks away from the fight and the one thing I am really worried about now is my weight haha! I am strengthening and conditioning for my fight and trying to manage my weight cut smart. I feel strong and Im sure I am going to be very strong for my fight. I want to be in the best condition ever. I am extremely excited about it. All I do is imagine fighting. I just visualize my attacks. What I will do if she comes forward. If she stays on the outside etc. I can't wait to meet her in the ring and fight her. When I close my eyes, I see myself landing an elbow and a hard knee. I imagine being the best muay thai practitioner I am training to be. Then my hand gets raised. haha!

45 weeks and 3 days

So its been 45 weeks and 3 days. I am cleared to fight again. I have been training only 5 days a week. 2 days of rest to make sure my knee has time to recover. I am resting a lot more than I ever have haha. I am set to fight January 31st. I dont have an opponent yet, but I am just going to be ready for it anyway.

How does my knee feel right now?
If I sit too long, I get stiff. I have to move it around.
It is numb on the side and I am still getting used to the numbness being the norm.
Every now and then I hear a loud click/crack. My knee just needs to adjust.
I can kneel on my knee. It still feels uncomfortable on the scar/patella area. I think the patella is still sensitive and I wonder if it will last forever.
I can do all these things now: Spar with kicks, push kicks, knees. I can jump! I can double jump. I can do jumps (knees to chest) all the way up to 10! I can sprint. I can jump rope for 3 rounds just like before. I can to a jump to my feet starting with my knees to the ground. I can do strength training on my leg. I can take 8 muay thai/kickboxing classes a week plus do mitt work plus strength and conditioning :-)

My other knee feels achy and I need to be careful. I got these knee compressions for both knees. I am wearing them when I train now. I thought I tore my meniscus on my good leg :-( but I think it was achy. I pushed through a training session and it magically felt better. It was achy over Thanksgiving. I think the rest was actually bad for it! I cant go more than 2 days without training or doing something active.

I am ready to fight. I dont care what the result is. I just hope to be healthy and strong to fight and keep on fighting after.

Week 33 ~8 months post acl and meniscus

I saw my surgeon yesterday and I am finally cleared to spar muay thai. He didnt clear me to fight though  :-/ I am sure my PT was let me start competing by now. I was lectured that I need to be careful and ease my way into sparring. I think its dumb because sometimes sparring can be super hard like a fight.

25 weeks

I talked to my PT yesterday and he said...if I feel like I can spar with kicks...do it. I am not going to go all hard and crazy. I am just going to work on my technique. I havent sparred yet. I am waiting for my knee and legs to get stronger to do it.

I did some single leg hops today and they didnt hurt! a few weeks ago, they would feel uncomfortable when I landed. But not anymore! As of today, the landing is so much smoother. :)

Week 24 6 months!

I am into my 24th week!
Saw my surgeon Thursday and I have good news....He has cleared me to start training again. I have been training for about a week now so I dont feel like I pushed it. I have done everything I possibly could leading up to today to get me where I am now...able to train! I see the doctor again in 6 weeks.

I am not allowed to spar yet. I have been sparring boxing and so for the next 6 more weeks, I plan on focusing on my hands and getting them better. I have to get my quad strong again as I wrote before. The surgeon didnt seem too bothered with my quad being 50% weaker than the good side. My hamstrings are kinda equivalent and so he was content with that. He said that the hamstring is more important than the quad since it supports the acl. I already knew this and have been working on hamstrings since surgery.

He wants me to wear my brace when I do agility training or side to side movements. I dont see the point in this and so Im not doing it. The brace just makes me have this false confidence. I feel stronger and good with out it!

For some reason Im not super excited about anything. I just feel tired. Ive been working hard at getting able to train and been stressing and worrying about not being able to train hard for competition. I am stressed out about not getting where I want to go with muay thai. But, I cant do that. I just hope that this is the last nasty injury. I know its not going to be the last but I hope and pray or plead that this acl injury is the last time....and I am hoping for no more concussions.